Saturday, November 26, 2011
I'm gonna let you go now
If there is one thing that some people say in this country that makes my skin crawl it is this line: "I'm gonna let you go, now..."
What do you mean you're gonna let me go now? Go where? And why are you letting me go already? What have I done to merit such abrupt ending, such finality?
Here I am having an uplifting conversation with you (on the phone), feeling close and cozy and basking in your attention, and suddenly you are going to let me go. Why? What happened? How did you become this distant person who is going to let me get out of your life without asking me if I am ready to do it?
Only a moment ago you were sharing the latest highlights of your life with me, and suddenly out of nowhere, without any apparent reason or warning, you are letting me go, shutting me out of your life until the next time you are going to bring me back into it, only to let me go again when you are running out of things to say.
And what if I am not ready to be let go? What are my rights when it comes to ending a phone conversation?
There is something so patronizing in this utterance: "I am going to let you go." Now you are the one who decides how long this conversation is going to last, you have more important things to do than spending the entire afternoon with me on the phone, you are done bestowing your graceful attention on me and I have to go back to my uninspiring life while you ride into the sunset.
Every time I hear this line uttered on the phone I want to smack the utterer in the face.
So person, If you need to go, just say it as it is: "Hey, I got to go, I got a ton of things to do, it was great talking to you, blah, blah, blah," but don't just let me go as if I am a fish on a hook who is getting a second chance. Don't put yourself above me with this subtle slap on the face: "I know you are hanging on to every one of my precious words, but unfortunately, I have to let you go, because it looks like you can't do this on your own."
Thank you for listening. You are welcome to stay for as long as you wish.
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